A "Calling"

[Soupie]

Hello!

For the past couple years, I have been experiencing what I have described as a "calling." I haven't experienced any external stimuli; the entire experience/feeling has been internal and subjective.

Here's how I describe it: It feels as if a something is gently calling, pulling, tugging at me - not physically but metaphorically. It wants my attention, or wants me. It's a positive feeling. And for my part, I'd like to - or be willing to - do something about it, but I'm not sure where to start.

At times, I have felt that there is something positive I can do for this something, such as a vocation. Let me be clear that I am not saying there is a voice telling me to do something. There is no voice. Furthermore, I haven't experienced any missing time, high strangeness, synchronicities, or anything paranormal. I also haven't experienced any trauma, head or otherwise.

Currently, I chalk this experience up to what one might consider unconscious psychological experiences. It's possible the something is really just my deep mind urging my conscious mind to do something.

I've searched for information about a "calling" and most of the resources are from a Christian perspective.

Does anybody have any resources they could point me toward regarding this experience? Thanks.

 

[Polterwurst]

Well, I'm experiencing something that's maybe a bit similar.

You've got to do something, this can't be all there is, your job sucks and so does your private life, is there a meaning to life or is the universe totally senseless, what does 42 mean, and why the heck isn't there any parking space in these cities any more? Over and over.

But at my age that's normal. It's called midlife-crisis...

I hope your calling is more specific.

 

[Soupie]

Well, I'm experiencing something that's maybe a bit similar.

You've got to do something, this can't be all there is, your job sucks and so does your private life, is there a meaning to life or is the universe totally senseless, what does 42 mean, and why the heck isn't there any parking space in these cities any more? Over and over.

But at my age that's normal. It's called midlife-crisis...

I hope your calling is more specific.

Haha!

It's not more specific, haha. In fact, it's much more vague than any of those thoughts/questions. I'm very pleased with my social, family, intellectual, and professional life at the moment. And yet there's this pulling...

 

[Jeff Davis]

IMO, you are missing something that either a) used to be a part of your life wherein you found a healthy relevance, or b) you have a subtle longing due to a subtle void in your life. Possibly spiritually. Do you meditate?

 

[boomerang]

The subconscious has its own intent and language. Deciphering what it is trying to tell you can be difficult and confusing. But ignoring it can be likewise perilous.

I don't think there is a set formula for communing with this part of yourself. Sitting alone in nature, 'talking to the mountains', seemed at one time the best approach for me. But everyone's gig is different.

Sorry if this is sounding like the inside of a Chinese fortune cookie. At any rate--good luck on your journey.

 

[Polterwurst]

There are fortune cookies like that? I gotta go eat chinese more often.

 

[Wade]

There are fortune cookies like that? I gotta go eat chinese more often.

愿你的胃和大脑既充满

 

[Polterwurst]

Gesundheit.

 

[Tyger]

Begin a Journal - though that may sound banal. Really it's an extended observation. Are there conditions that surround the 'calling'? What precedes, what follows. Thoughts, feelings, images.

Ask questions of the 'calling' - go into a very quiet interior, no distractions exterior to you - and then 'listen'.

Most revelatory are images - if they are not merely off-gassing from the day's events. Emotions - a feeling. Notate them - expand on them. Play with them.

What is wonderful about such is that only you are the authority on what they mean. It's a mystery you must find out.

I have had an experience - mystical - ever since I was a little one. In all my questing - which has been considerable - it's actual meaning/significance remains elusive, though through intense observation over decades I have some clues.

Through it all, I have always been reminded of T.S. Eliot's words: "We shall not cease from exploration, and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started and know the place for the first time."

So maybe that is it - it is 'home' that I am 'recalling' and I will know it for the first time - in consciousness - at the very end.

I sometimes wonder if it's eternity (whatever that may be) poking through into this finite existence - anon and again I glimpse the blue through the clouds. Earlier it was a profound 'keening' for 'something' - trembling on the brink of 'something' that I know and recall and miss in my soul of souls. But as I've 'settled' into this world - accepted the blinkers - been 'schooled to the rod' of physical 'laws' - I am okay with not knowing what blows in that great wind of 'nostalgia' - if that is the right word.

What am I 'remembering' that this human brain cannot fully make sense of? Is it the Great Nostalgia that Mikhail Naimy tries to describe in his 'The Book of Mirdad' - or that mystics allude to? I don't know - only that I am in the realm of metaphor when I talk about it - there is no 'this world' concept to either explain or describe it - which is perhaps evidence of it's significance.

 

[Tyger]

Hello!

For the past couple years, I have been experiencing what I have described as a "calling." I haven't experienced any external stimuli; the entire experience/feeling has been internal and subjective.

Here's how I describe it: It feels as if a something is gently calling, pulling, tugging at me - not physically but metaphorically. It wants my attention, or wants me. It's a positive feeling. And for my part, I'd like to - or be willing to - do something about it, but I'm not sure where to start.

Sounds lovely. I feel this way as I am about to have a turn of destiny - especially if I'm about to 'meet' significant individuals (a love).

At times, I have felt that there is something positive I can do for this something, such as a vocation. Let me be clear that I am not saying there is a voice telling me to do something. There is no voice. Furthermore, I haven't experienced any missing time, high strangeness, synchronicities, or anything paranormal. I also haven't experienced any trauma, head or otherwise.

Important clue.

Currently, I chalk this experience up to what one might consider unconscious psychological experiences. It's possible the something is really just my deep mind urging my conscious mind to do something.

That's just a jumble of words. Psychology - unless it's Jungian (and even it has it's limitations) - is completely inept when it comes to understanding the full gestalt of the human being. My opinion, of course.

I've searched for information about a "calling" and most of the resources are from a Christian perspective.

Find a synonym for 'calling' - you've already used the word 'pulling', a 'tug' - which imply towards something. Is that an accurate impression?

Does anybody have any resources they could point me toward regarding this experience? Thanks.

I have read countless mystical and occult works. No easy task to pick and choose one source. As with this realm always - it is approached through metaphor - that is a clue.

I have mentioned Mikhail Naimy's 'The Book of Mirdad' - for some reason, among all that I am acquainted with, the impulse was to mention that book, that author - and came across this (that I have not read) by the same author (who was a friend of Kahlil Gibran): 'Memoirs Of A Vagrant Soul Or The Pitted Face'.

Amazon Review: "Just like Mikhail Naimy's 'The book of Mirdad' this book is a story of another dimension of Life. It goes to the very depth of human soul (not mind!). How to explain the mystery of life unless you yourself take the role of existence? This is what Mikhail Naimy is doing. Very rare souls are able to catch the truth and message from existence, keep it clean and write it down. This is a very special book; Truth unmanifest speaking through truth manifest. Mikhail Naimy is its medium."

Result: I have just purchased the book from Amazon - so thank you for your question, for it led me to this book.

Fact is, we are on a journey, we are following bread crumbs - and sometimes the 'answers' to the signposts are found in the most unexpected places.

 

[Burnt State]

Listening to and growing desire has its own consequences and rewards. Meditation is a good way to mediate&investigate desire as are painting, writing, making music & films...climbing mountains is another way to clear the mind and better define the desire that whispers in your mind and calls you to fields unknown or -

maybe it's time to get a dog and just settle into that mortal skin, you know, go for walks and keep out of trouble?

 

[Soupie]

IMO, you are missing something that either a) used to be a part of your life wherein you found a healthy relevance, or b) you have a subtle longing due to a subtle void in your life. Possibly spiritually. Do you meditate?

"Longing" is a good word for the feeling in the sense that it is typically a "background" feeling that only occasionally comes to the forefront of my awareness.

My life certainly has changed over the years, and things/people present in the past are no longer. That could be it... but that's not the sense I get. For instance, I have longed for relationships lost, and this feeling is different than that feeling. Still, it's a good thought.

And yes, it would be easy to ascribe a spiritual aspect/flavor to this experience.

 

[Soupie]

Find a synonym for 'calling' - you've already used the word 'pulling', a 'tug' - which imply towards something. Is that an accurate impression?

That's a great idea and partially the reason for this post. I was wondering if others had a similar feeling/experience and could direct me to a resource regarding it. The term "calling" does seem to be part of the Christian spiritual perspective, and I wonder what other spiritual perspectives would have to say.

@smcder shared in another thread the concept of the Perennial philosophy which I will explore.

Perennial philosophy - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Perennialists argue that although the sacred scriptures of the world religions are undeniably diverse and often superficially oppose each other, one can discern a common doctrine regarding the ultimate purpose of human life. Typically this doctrine is posited as mystical insofar as it views the summum bonum of human life as an experiential union with the supreme being (sometimes perceived as an "energy" such as the universe) which can only be achieved by undertaking a programme of physical and mental 'purification' or 'improvement'.[citation needed]

I have mentioned Mikhail Naimy's 'The Book of Mirdad' - for some reason, among all that I am acquainted with, the impulse was to mention that book, that author - and came across this (that I have not read) by the same author (who was a friend of Kahlil Gibran): 'Memoirs Of A Vagrant Soul Or The Pitted Face'.

Amazon Review: "Just like Mikhail Naimy's 'The book of Mirdad' this book is a story of another dimension of Life. It goes to the very depth of human soul (not mind!). How to explain the mystery of life unless you yourself take the role of existence? This is what Mikhail Naimy is doing. Very rare souls are able to catch the truth and message from existence, keep it clean and write it down. This is a very special book; Truth unmanifest speaking through truth manifest. Mikhail Naimy is its medium."

I will check these out for sure. Thanks.

Result: I have just purchased the book from Amazon - so thank you for your question, for it led me to this book.

Excellent!

 

[mike]

I tried indulging in nostalgia once.

But it just wasnt the same as i remembered it

 

[marduk]

The couple of folks I know that have had "callings" have immediately dropped their old life in favour of the new one: they knew exactly what they were "supposed" to do.

I approach such things from a more zen standpoint: we exist in a state of samsara, or the continuous cycle of life and suffering. We always yearn for something more: the absence of suffering and the desire for the things we think will bring us happiness.

Is your calling desire in disguise?

 

[Burnt State]

it's important to be wary of desire.

 

[Tyger]

it's important to be wary of desire.

It is?

 

[marduk]

The first noble truth is that suffering exists.
The second is that desire causes suffering.
The third is that suffering can end.
The fourth is that there is a path to end the suffering.

I'm massively paraphrasing here and any true buddhist would likely smack me upside the head for attempting to do so.

 

[Soupie]

The couple of folks I know that have had "callings" have immediately dropped their old life in favour of the new one: they knew exactly what they were "supposed" to do.

As noted, calling may not be the correct term for my particular experience. But for now I use the term "calling" because I am not the seeker; I am being sought.

Is your calling desire in disguise?

No.

 

[Burnt State]

It is?

Well, sometimes. And other times it's just much more fulfilling and fun.