boulders and sticks
Occupation: Astronaut and Juggler
Hi
I thought i would share this. My buddy just sent it to me.
Sorry for the way it is layed out.
John.
The
> following is an actual question given on a University of
> <?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com
lace>Washington</ST1lace></st1:State> chemistry
> mid term.
>
>
> The
> answer by one student was so 'profound' that the
> professor shared it with
> colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we
> now have the
> pleasure of enjoying it as well :
>
>
>
> Bonus
> Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or
> endothermic (absorbs
> heat)?
>
>
> Most
> of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using
> Boyle's Law(gas
> cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or
> some variant.
>
>
> One
> student, however, wrote the following:
>
>
> First,
> we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So
> we need
> to know the rate at which souls are moving into
> Hell
> and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can
> safely assume
> that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore,
> no souls
> are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell,
> let's look at
> the different religions that exist in the world
> today.
>
>
> Most
> of these religions state that if you are not a member of
> their religion,
> you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of
> these religions
> and since people do not belong to more than one religion,
> we can
> project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death
> rates as they
> are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to
> increase exponentially.
> Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in
> Hell because
> Boyle's Law states that in order for the
> temperature
> and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of
> Hell has
> to expand proportionately as souls are added.
>
>
> This
> gives two possibilities:
>
>
> 1.
> If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which
> souls enter
> Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will
> increase until
> all Hell breaks loose.
>
>
> 2.
> If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of
> souls in Hell,
> then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell
> freezes over.
>
>
> So
> which is it?
>
>
> If
> we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my
> Freshman year that,
> 'It will be a cold day in Hell before I
> sleep
> with you,' and take into account the fact that I slept
> with her last
> night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that
> Hell is
> exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of
> this theory is
> that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not
> accepting any
> more souls and is therefore, extinct......leaving only
> Heaven, there by
> proving the existence of a divine being which explains why,
> last night,
> Teresa kept shouting 'Oh my God.'
>
> THIS
> STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+.
>
>
>
>
I thought i would share this. My buddy just sent it to me.
Sorry for the way it is layed out.
John.
The
> following is an actual question given on a University of
> <?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com
lace>Washington</ST1lace></st1:State> chemistry> mid term.
>
>
> The
> answer by one student was so 'profound' that the
> professor shared it with
> colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we
> now have the
> pleasure of enjoying it as well :
>
>
>
> Bonus
> Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or
> endothermic (absorbs
> heat)?
>
>
> Most
> of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using
> Boyle's Law(gas
> cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or
> some variant.
>
>
> One
> student, however, wrote the following:
>
>
> First,
> we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So
> we need
> to know the rate at which souls are moving into
> Hell
> and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can
> safely assume
> that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore,
> no souls
> are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell,
> let's look at
> the different religions that exist in the world
> today.
>
>
> Most
> of these religions state that if you are not a member of
> their religion,
> you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of
> these religions
> and since people do not belong to more than one religion,
> we can
> project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death
> rates as they
> are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to
> increase exponentially.
> Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in
> Hell because
> Boyle's Law states that in order for the
> temperature
> and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of
> Hell has
> to expand proportionately as souls are added.
>
>
> This
> gives two possibilities:
>
>
> 1.
> If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which
> souls enter
> Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will
> increase until
> all Hell breaks loose.
>
>
> 2.
> If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of
> souls in Hell,
> then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell
> freezes over.
>
>
> So
> which is it?
>
>
> If
> we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my
> Freshman year that,
> 'It will be a cold day in Hell before I
> sleep
> with you,' and take into account the fact that I slept
> with her last
> night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that
> Hell is
> exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of
> this theory is
> that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not
> accepting any
> more souls and is therefore, extinct......leaving only
> Heaven, there by
> proving the existence of a divine being which explains why,
> last night,
> Teresa kept shouting 'Oh my God.'
>
> THIS
> STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+.
>
>
>
>
