Anonymity

[TClaeys]

I have an obvious interest in UfO's and I suppose other fringe topics as well. I even think that UFO's are worthy of investigation for a number of reasons. But here is the weird thing and perhaps it is not all that weird or unusual:

I am in the closet on these topics. I don't ever bring them up with family members or friends. My wife knows I have an interest, but not to the level that I actually have. I will actually do stuff like change web pages if she comes nearby. I have books that I will keep in my room and read when no one is around. I watch TV shows on DVR at times when everyone is asleep.

WHY?? Why do I do this? I guess I even feel somewhat embarrassed to read and sift through these topics. I think it is one reason I post on these forums, although I don't neccessarily keep my identity hidden. The forum is anonymous enough. I don't have a job where I would be looked down upon for my views and interests, so it doesn't really matter in that respect.

All this and I've never even seen a UFO or had a clear paranormal experience. I just have to wonder and question my motives for being so intoverted on these topics? Surely there is a stigma attached even if it is a percieved one. Family might think I'm crazy. My wife might question the time I spend on these topics and perhaps rightly so. What does it really matter in the scope of life?? And why am I drawn to such endeavors?? It may be very well completely useless.

So I ask, does anyone else deal with this anonymity problem?? And I wonder how many more don't even discuss such topics because of fear of ridicule. I hear this "fear of ridicule" thing all the time and think it is garbage. I say "Just talk about it for Christsakes". At the same time I find myself subscribing to such a tenant.

If we are free to think about and discuss such matters why is there such a reluctancy for people to do so?? And why does the media reinforce such restrictions?? Perhaps the reality of such topics is so powerful, so potentially profound, that it somehow naturally forms it's own repellent.

 

[Ally]

I am quite open about my interest in these topics but annoymous on these forums....go fugure.

The ridicule factor is real but so is somebody saying.. oh I had an experience that I can't talk about but I want to tell somebody.

I was stuck in a room with nice but very nosy woman recently. She couldn't ask enough questions about eveything. I told her I was interested in UFOs and the paranormal and she OH whatever and stopped asking me questions. It comes in handy once in awhile.

 

[macavity]

TClaeys,

I feel pretty much the same way you do, although perhaps to a somewhat lesser degree when it comes to remaining anonymous in the home, for example I don't hide it from close family and friends - it just hardly ever comes up as they have little interest in the paranormal. I'm probably more concerned from a professional point of view though, rightly or wrongly I'd almost certainly lose some credibility with my peers if my interest was known.

Perhaps the reality of such topics is so powerful, so potentially profound

It's interesting you should mention how potentially profound this subject is, I'm occasionally struck by the same thought - and in fact the last time was early this morning! A strange feeling, similar to that of considering your own mortality or - I suspect - the same kind of feeling David described when he saw the UFO in Venezuela. A kind of shifting of the sands of reality under your feet. Unsettling, and not particularly pleasant.

 

[fitzbew88]

I am in the closet on these topics. I don't ever bring them up with family members or friends. My wife knows I have an interest, but not to the level that I actually have. I will actually do stuff like change web pages if she comes nearby. I have books that I will keep in my room and read when no one is around. I watch TV shows on DVR at times when everyone is asleep.

My wife will listen, but she won't talk about it. She simply doesn't want anything to do with it.

WHY?? Why do I do this? I guess I even feel somewhat embarrassed to read and sift through these topics. I think it is one reason I post on these forums, although I don't neccessarily keep my identity hidden. The forum is anonymous enough. I don't have a job where I would be looked down upon for my views and interests, so it doesn't really matter in that respect.

You are wise to be circumspect. You might want a job in the future, and you don't want the Paracast forums to come up when they Google your name. For many prospective employers, it will simply be a show-stopper or at least a reason to hesitate.

What does it really matter in the scope of life?? And why am I drawn to such endeavors?? It may be very well completely useless.

Curiosity is never useless. Dangerous, maybe.

So I ask, does anyone else deal with this anonymity problem??

I try to stay anonymous in internet forums, of course. And I don't try to discuss such issues except with people who have known me a long time.

 

[Poi]

If the subject comes up, I'll tell people about our sightings and watch people squirm. I know they're squirming for me, but I don't much care. Other than that, I have no one with which to discuss them since my family members are on the fence and my spouse is very uncomfortable with our sightings together. Forums are my haven for learning and discussing as I suspect is the case for many posters on the net.

As for anonymity, there are enough nuts on the net that it's warranted no matter the topic of interest.

 

[Aaron LeClair]

I'm not in the closet, and I have never been ridiculed for my interest in person. That I can recall at least. Maybe behind my back, but I wasn't there.

Fear of ridicule is why most, if not all would be in the closet I reason. If I were to be embarrassed, it would be for certain "researchers" instead of the subject matter.

 

[Chuckleberryfinn]

Sheeit. I'm not only open about this subject but annoyingly open. If interest in UFOs were akin to openness about homosexuality, I would be RuPaul. I tell my bosses and coworkers about it and try to make them interested. I burn copies of certain, unnamed, super-duper UFO documentaries and give them to my friends. And I'm a teacher! A real teacher at a real high school.

I've never understood this fear of ridicule business. If you've got union support and don't discuss your interests with students in the classroom or coworkers when you should be doing actual work, there's absolutely no reason you'd be fired. Looked down upon? Maybe. But who gives a goddamn about that. Look down on me all you want. I'm still the one who is right, not the simple minded wanna-be debunkers and Carl Sagan quoters with whom I interact, and that makes me feel empowered to be even more open about it. I don my facts, keep them in hand, and take on those who would look down upon me. I have a file of my favorite cases, and I remember those small handful of cases and study them in great detail, and I focus on them at the exclusion of everything else and hammer the reality of UFOs into my collegues' heads with this high quality info.

That said, I do have other interests that I discuss with them. That way it doesn't become too annoying. Some people just aren't interested and I grant them their right not to be interested and don't discuss it with them. Well, not as much, at least. From time to time, I tell them that they ought to be interested and then provide reasons why.

 

[Graphimancer]

I pass for normal in most circumstances, but once people find out I'm a professional cartoonist then an interest in the paranormal seems unsurprising to them. I guess as an artist, who mostly hangs out with other artists, fringe interests are taken in stride. That having been said, most people in the comic industry don't seem interested in the real paranormal reality.

In mixing with the general populace, I don't mention my fringe interests too much anymore. I'm not ashamed of my interests, but the last time I brought the subject up I attracted the attention of a mentally ill person who wouldn't leave me alone. Other people want to discuss my material or my career, but frankly don't care about the paranormal. You would think that science fiction and fantasy fans would be open to these things, but they are not: they are far more interested in the fantasy of such things.

My wife is a co-experiencer, but if I bring up any sort of theory, she's not interested.

 

[swatcher]

... and I focus on them at the exclusion of everything else and hammer the reality of UFOs into my collegues' heads with this high quality info.

What reality? Are you saying you have actual proof? Care to disclose?

 

[Chuckleberryfinn]

I mean that the phenomenon called UFOs is real and anomalous. That's why I chose that phrase, "the reality of UFOs," and not the reality of [insert pet theory]."

If I call you smart one-thousand times in a row for a week, will you be less of a dick?

 

[swatcher]

I mean that the phenomenon called UFOs is real and anomalous. That's why I chose that phrase, "the reality of UFOs," and not the reality of [insert pet theory]."

If I call you smart one-thousand times in a row for a week, will you be less of a dick?

I didn't know that IQ is related to penis size, but you seem to know better ...

Again, what evidence do you have that "the phenomenon called UFOs" is real? You were talking about UFO documentaries, but I have yet to see one with real evidence. People have been studying this thing for decades. Volumes of books, but evidence?

 

[mike]

ive been married for almost 23 years and i dont need to hide any internet pages from her.
we dont share every interest but we are kindred spirits in regards to seeking knowledge.

i'm very lucky

 

[Raevenskye]

I'm not totally in the closet about the things I see and experience....those who know me well probably know *most* big things. I"ll often test the waters with new people, by throwing out a comment. If they respond well, or ask questions, I'll continue. If not, then I drop it.
My husband is VERY open to experiences, and we love to analyze these things together. He has had a few paranormal experiences, but not many. He doens't chastise me for mine.
However, I don't really tell anyone what goes on day to day. Mostly, because it's not much of a story to say: I saw those lights in the room again. I'm way more open here. I still have that twinge of "oh crap...what'd I say??", but it's VERY liberating to finally talk about it all!

 

[Chuckleberryfinn]

I mean that the phenomenon called UFOs is real and anomalous. That's why I chose that phrase, "the reality of UFOs," and not the reality of [insert pet theory]."

If I call you smart one-thousand times in a row for a week, will you be less of a dick?

I didn't know that IQ is related to penis size, but you seem to know better ...

Again, what evidence do you have that "the phenomenon called UFOs" is real? You were talking about UFO documentaries, but I have yet to see one with real evidence. People have been studying this thing for decades. Volumes of books, but evidence?

Yeah, evidence. Physical trace cases, radar/visual cases, multiple witness sightings. Evidence. If you don't see such cases as evidence, I would recommend rethinking your ideas on what constitutes evidence.

How nice of you to imply that I only watch documentaries instead of reading UFO books.

 

[Graphimancer]

Again, what evidence do you have that "the phenomenon called UFOs" is real? You were talking about UFO documentaries, but I have yet to see one with real evidence. People have been studying this thing for decades. Volumes of books, but evidence?

The fact that there is a forum to discuss this means that there is a subject to discuss. Challenging everyone for hard proof is trollish. You know the situation as well as everyone else. It's not cool to attack people for discussing a reality as they see it.

 

[swatcher]

Again, what evidence do you have that "the phenomenon called UFOs" is real? You were talking about UFO documentaries, but I have yet to see one with real evidence. People have been studying this thing for decades. Volumes of books, but evidence?

The fact that there is a forum to discuss this means that there is a subject to discuss. Challenging everyone for hard proof is trollish. You know the situation as well as everyone else. It's not cool to attack people for discussing a reality as they see it.

There is a forum to discuss the existence of Pokemon. Does that make the subject more real?

Challenging everyone (incl. myself) is paramount. This fringe science called "Ufology" is in dire need of a paradigm change. IMHO a dissenting opinion should not be prematurely labeled as "trolling". But of course I'm biased

"You know the situation as well as everyone else". That is the crux of the matter. I've experienced strange stuff, but I "know" nothing about it. To this day my brain can't make sense of the puzzle. I can't qualify my experience. No, I don't know the situation at all ...

Yes, attacking people is not cool and I apologize if I came across that way. BTW:Chuckleberryfinn and I go way back ;-)

 

[Aaron LeClair]

Again, what evidence do you have that "the phenomenon called UFOs" is real? You were talking about UFO documentaries, but I have yet to see one with real evidence. People have been studying this thing for decades. Volumes of books, but evidence?

The fact that there is a forum to discuss this means that there is a subject to discuss. Challenging everyone for hard proof is trollish. You know the situation as well as everyone else. It's not cool to attack people for discussing a reality as they see it.

There is a forum to discuss the existence of Pokemon. Does that make the subject more real?

Challenging everyone (incl. myself) is paramount. This fringe science called "Ufology" is in dire need of a paradigm change. IMHO a dissenting opinion should not be prematurely labeled as "trolling". But of course I'm biased

"You know the situation as well as everyone else". That is the crux of the matter. I've experienced strange stuff, but I "know" nothing about it. To this day my brain can't make sense of the puzzle. I can't qualify my experience. No, I don't know the situation at all ...

Yes, attacking people is not cool and I apologize if I came across that way. BTW:Chuckleberryfinn and I go way back ;-)

Pokemon is an imaginary character. It is an idea, or cartoon, ideas and cartoons are real, meaning are a part of our reality and can be experienced.

Now, UFO/s means unidentified flying object/s. You are saying there are no such things. Or that there isn't evidence for it, correct?.

 

[Graphimancer]

"You know the situation as well as everyone else". That is the crux of the matter. I've experienced strange stuff, but I "know" nothing about it. To this day my brain can't make sense of the puzzle. I can't qualify my experience. No, I don't know the situation at all ...

Seems reasonable, Swatcher.

I guess my point is calling for proof is a good subject in its own right, but if, for example, you were to go to a right-wing Christian forum and suddenly interject yourself on threads about whatever and calling on people to objectively show proof God exists, it would have the same result. Yes, you can make that demand, but it's out of place. The people there have already made their minds up, and challenging them like that is merely riling them up for the sake of riling them.

I don't even know where I stand on UFOs. I can talk UFO lore and case specifics as well as most "fans," ie. the readers of books and watchers of video, but I'm really unsure what is really happening.

 

[swatcher]

I'm going to create a new thread. I don't want to derail this one any further.

 

[PamiP]

My husband thought I was "a little left of center" when I would talk about UFOs when we first married. He'd do the squirmy thing as well and change the subject as quickly as he could. Then we built a swimming pool in our backyard and would be out there with the children late into summer's evenings. You should have seen the look on his face when he first saw something anomylous in the sky! After a few sightings, he's a believer and we now have a topic we can discuss freely together. Due to these sightings, our children realized the universe is a very large place and probabilites of other civilizations are not a myth, but a reality.

My co-workers, though, are a different story!