If I was paranoid: A conspiracy to block cures for baldness and obesity

[Gareth]

I often wonder why as a society we havent made deeper inroads into these two areas. When you look at some of the drugs that we have available that have such precise, specific actions that they perform.

For example MDMA (commonly known as ecstasy). There is a neurotransmitter in the brain called serotonin that regulates feelings of well-being and happiness. MDMA specifically targets these receptors and stops the re-uptake of serotonin into the brain, and thus gives the user feelings of overwhelming happiness etc...

Now that is just one example, and there are many more that I could have chosen. So why cant they come up with something that inhibits the body's natural tendendy to absorb and store fat cells? Same with balding? Why cant they create a drug that tells the body not to flip that switch that causes balding?

Coming at it from a conspiracy angle, if we all had the ability to look as slim as we want and to have as much hair as we want, well we would probably feel A SHIT LOAD better about ourselves and have waaaaay more self-confidence. We would therefore be a lot harder to control, would probably consume less and be less obsessed with celebrity.

So am I just a paranoid nutter?

 

[Aaron LeClair]

Propecia works pretty well.

 

[Gene Steinberg]

Propecia works pretty well.

Does it go with cheese?

 

[Gareth]

Dont get me wrong. I dont need anything myself (yet). Its just something I occaisonally think about.

 

[Aaron LeClair]

Does it go with cheese?

Doesn't everything?

 

[Aaron LeClair]

Dont get me wrong. I dont need anything myself (yet). Its just something I occaisonally think about.

I used propecia back years ago. I thought I was going bald. I wasn't. I had real bad skin problems in which thinned my hair. After taking Acutane and cured my skin problems, my hair got back to "normal". I've started to grey a little in recent years though.

 

[status4]

So why cant they come up with something that inhibits the body's natural tendency to absorb and store fat cells?

Well, I'm not an MD, my doctorate is in chemistry, but I've studied more pharmacology then most MDs so here's my take. I'll try to make this sound somewhat logical, no promises though. There are drugs which block the body from absorbing fat, Orilistat is likely the most popular, it's just a fat blocker that keeps fats from being broken down so that they pass straight through with minimal absorption. There are many others which do the same, but they aren't the most effective drugs, and they have adverse effects such as gastrointestinal distress and problems with absorbing certain vitamins and minerals which are essential.

Now, blocking fat absorption on a temporary basis is one thing, here is the problem with stopping the body from storing fat. We are 60% water. Our bodies store water in our fat cells, without fat cells for water and energy our bodies tend to look to other lean tissues to burn in order to produce water for hydration and energy to keep our vital organs functioning. You can't block just "a little fat", the body doesn't work that way, if we were to design a drug that blocked the storing of fat, we would quickly reduce our fat level to zero and our body would begin to devour healthy tissue such as muscle to stay alive and as such would in short order kill us. You might feel great about your svelt waistline for a short time, but death is a pretty nasty side effect for any drug, pretty sure the FDA, stupid as they are, would frown upon that one.

Same with balding? Why cant they create a drug that tells the body not to flip that switch that causes balding?

Um, the short answer?.......... we don't know where the switch is Not sure why some men are immune to the effects of DHT (Dihydrotestosterone) or why hair on the back and sides of the head are immune while hair on top and in front isn't, figure that one out and you'll be very rich.

So am I just a paranoid nutter?

um, yes, but we love ya anyway

 

[Kevin Daly]

Interesting point you raised about the hair on the back and sides of the head.
One of the things that strikes me as a terrible injustice is that hair doesn't just thin, it bloody migrates, so I end up with hair (or more hair) where I'd rather it wasn't in addition to not enough hair where I wish it was. And you know that when that happens women talk about you as if you're growing it there on purpose.

All thing's considered, life's a poo sandwich.

 

[cottonzway]

No "conspiracy" in some "evil" means. I have a full head of hair and only overweight because I am lazy and like chesse, rather then David Rockefeller plotting my peril. So I don't see that. When I diet and take martial arts, I am in good shape. Otherwise, it is on me. The hair is genetics though or to to stress.

 

[status4]

Interesting point you raised about the hair on the back and sides of the head.
One of the things that strikes me as a terrible injustice is that hair doesn't just thin, it bloody migrates, so I end up with hair (or more hair) where I'd rather it wasn't in addition to not enough hair where I wish it was. And you know that when that happens women talk about you as if you're growing it there on purpose.

All thing's considered, life's a poo sandwich.

True indeed, started losing mine when I was 25 or so.

What's with the random hairs growing out of the ears?.....anyone figure that out yet? and what about the odd eyebrow hairs that don't match the others and grow straight out?

 

[Gareth]

hehehe thanks for the replies guys.

Although its obvious youre all just working for the Government.

 

[status4]

hehehe thanks for the replies guys.

Although its obvious youre all just working for the Government.

Us? No Way! Oh, we would appreciate it if you would be home between 8am and 12 Noon on Thursday, we will be by to implant your chip. Thanks in advance for your co-operation. Also, please pay no attention to the Pete's Plumbing van that's been parked outside your place for just a little bit too long, nothing to see there.

 

[Gareth]

I just have one request: Pleeeeeease let me keep all my hair

 

[TClaeys]

We don't want to cure obesity because we are working on ways to tax it. Like the proposition in New York. Lets put an outrageous tax on all the stuff that apparently makes people fat, .... you know so that EVERYONE will have to pay tax on good stuff, like Mountain Dew. Even my non-fat ass!! And while we're at it, lets tax health club memberships too, just because we can.

Hmmmm, ......how do we tax baldness?? Oh yes, tax hikes on hats and sunblock. While we're at that lets up the tax on haircuts as well.

 

[Frootloop]

The best medication to prevent obesity is to sell the TV and go for walks instead. This treatment also comes with the side effect of preventing the constant flow of bull-sh1t and unwelcome advertising pouring into your home.

as for baldness, ya got me there......

 

[Raevenskye]

True indeed, started losing mine when I was 25 or so.

What's with the random hairs growing out of the ears?.....anyone figure that out yet? and what about the odd eyebrow hairs that don't match the others and grow straight out?

those are "feelers"

 

[status4]

those are "feelers"

So I'm not getting old, I'm just evolving, excellent!

 

[Hoffmeister]

I guy I once vaguely used to know who is quite well known in the American sports nutrition scene said tat one company did find what was basically a cure, but for reasons he wouldnt tell me (his words were "i'd have to kill you if I told you"), it never got put into production, although he did say one American celebrity he knew found out about it and had a chemist create it for him..... Whether that bullshit or not i dont know, or whether it actually worked.
I always though it seemed unlikely as they would be sitting on a goldmine, but perhaps there was another effect to the drug.

I actual sense, they do have a cure for baldness, altho it would involve stoppping testosterone function altogether... either by things such as spironolactone or simply by chopping your balls off.

Current effective solutions that are legal include Rogaine (only effective on the top/back of the heaad and propecia. Basically testosterone is converted into DHT by two different enzymes in the body and the DHT has an immuno-response making the body reject the hair, almost like transplant patients reject their transoplants. In fact, it has apparently been noticed that transplant patients who are taking anti-immmune response drugs have regrown some of their hair.... so there's another impractical cure.

Propecia switches off one of the enzymes that turns your testosterone into DHT, and hence does a good job of either helping to regrow some hair, or atleast slowing it down.
There is a drug Dutasteride (branded as Avodart) which switches of both enzymes and this would apparently appear to be the holy grail to some people of hairloss, although it has only been cleared for use as an anti prostate hytrophy drug so far (yes DHT is responsible for causing prostate problems in old dudes aswell), so in England atleast, if you want it you basically have to buy it over the internet illegally risking fakes etc

Thats the long and short of it, there other things that can help but i really dont think there is any conspiracy going on. As for a cure for obesity? Exercise...

 

[mike]

i got hair in ears, i got hair in my nose, i got hair on my back and between my toes........

 

[Tommy Allison]

Bald is beautiful.

Even some chicks can pull it off. Not every head is perfect, which is why some of them look retarded when they lose their hair. I assure though, bald guys can get more tail than a toilet seat if they have the right look.

Smart women are attracted to bald guys. I encourage everyone to shave their head just once, to see how people treat you. It's a night and day difference. I'm wondering if it's not something ingrained.