Aaron banned?

[David Biedny]

I have nothing against Aaron, and would welcome him back to the forums. I don't tend to think of myself as an SOB, I can be moody but ultimately, I try to do right by folks. Well, I suppose I sometimes don't let folks get away with mishigaas. What can I say? Aaron, come back, just be cool, OK?

dB

 

[mike]

I have nothing against Aaron, and would welcome him back to the forums. I don't tend to think of myself as an SOB, I can be moody but ultimately, I try to do right by folks. Well, I suppose I sometimes don't let folks get away with mishigaas. What can I say? Aaron, come back, just be cool, OK?

dB

yep ive done it again, i am sorry SOB was a handy Colloquialism, and poorly thought through in its usage.

i assure you it was meant to be light hearted and friendly in its application.

my own fault as usual took a shortcut instead of putting in the hard yards so to speak.

so if i think about what i really meant by those words hard assed sob, i would refine by saying you can be "reactive" in a manner that is sometimes destructive, which is perfectly normal for an angry human.........

this is not a criticism of you as a person, ive done my own internet sluething and have you down as a "good" guy for criteria that might surprise many.
and its why im taking the time to get involved with this because i believe that both parties are critical thinkers and would/should seek an "optimum" result here

you had every right to pull Aaron up for the posts, but im not emotionally involved so , from my viewpoint i cant help thinking like an armchair general.

both sides set fire to their end of the bridge....

him by saying delete my account (whilst drunk and making poor decisions)
you by banning him for the insult, no doubt angry at the response you got .

youve obviously extended your hand to him as per your last post, and i'd call on him to accept it in the spirit its given, and for the sake of an "optimal" result.

we all make mistakes ,thats just human, the trick in my humble opinion is to always strive to think about how we think and always strive for the optimal result.

 

[qqqq]

He he noticed a few posts from him over the past few days were a couple of shockers, I'm fine with it, Hope he's all fine personally.

 

[schticknz]

Don't really understand why everyone is so upset about Aaron leaving. My god ... he called me a turd recently cos I showed him how to do something. I'll not miss him.

Oh and for those that don't know, Gil Bavel left recently too ... but I don't think anyone even noticed ... oh well such is life

 

[status4]

as ive hinted at bridges can be rebuilt.

once a DMZ has been established a construction design is chosen, popular designs include those that span the gulf by simultanious construction from both sides.... meeting in the middle.

and from a topological pov new bridges are often better and stronger than the originals they replace.

I'm not sure, but I think Mike just condensed the entire training process of the Army Core of Engineers into one short paragraph

 

[Gareth]

Don't really understand why everyone is so upset about Aaron leaving. My god ... he called me a turd recently cos I showed him how to do something. I'll not miss him.

Oh and for those that don't know, Gil Bavel left recently too ... but I don't think anyone even noticed ... oh well such is life

I would have eventually. Why did he leave?

 

[Siani]

It seems Gil has deleted me from his MySpace friends. No idea why.

 

[bobheck]

I would have eventually. Why did he leave?

Well, Gil and I had a 'spirited' debate over actions and animal kindness. But, I certainly don't think it would have risen to the level of making one leave the forum, unless one was insanely thin-skinned. Didn't even know he had left, to be honest.

Sorry to see him go.

I would hope that the forum still has a healthy growth rate though, even with the few exits mentioned.

 

[schticknz]

Gil had his reasons. I got a quick message from him before I could reply he had gone. Partly he said he'd become a bit disillusioned by the Paracast and the forums, and he said he felt this place had become or was becoming a bit like ATS.

Obviously I couldn't discuss this with him and what he meant before he left ... so make of that what you will.

Still I felt he was a pretty decent guy, and truly there are seemingly fewer of them out there if you scratch the surface or dig down a bit*

[*discovered this week that the dour "conspiracy theorist" Alan Watt is just a plagiarist and conman ... yet another of the "good" guys turns out to be a bad guy - see here: http://www.outlawjournalism.com/?p=85]

 

[mike]

Crud on a Kransky......

im not in here batting for Aaron, he and i have had our own run in's... in private.
and hes had a habit of pissing on posts like a territorial terrier.
everything happens for a reason....
if they have stagnated in this pond then they should seek new ponds, perhaps they will find something elsewhere , in time they would have otherwise spent here, that is relevant to their "journey" and i get the firm impression they will always be welcome back.

and im only guessing when i suppose that could i offer a "magic wand" to make this all disapear, both sides would take me up on the offer, or if i had a time machine and could let the decisions be made with the 20/20 vision of hindsight , again the same.

but we dont have a magic wand or a time machine, the only mechanism we have is communication and critical thinking...

 

[Gareth]

Gil had his reasons. I got a quick message from him before I could reply he had gone. Partly he said he'd become a bit disillusioned by the Paracast and the forums, and he said he felt this place had become or was becoming a bit like ATS.

No offence to Gil, and I liked him, but that right there is complete and utter bullshit.

 

[Tommy Allison]

I must have missed one hell of a batch of posts from Aaron. He's usually harassing me about how heinous and meanspirited I am.

Wow... Who knew?

 

[mike]

any sentiments gil may or may not have expressed in private should remain there imho....

for the record and with full acknowledgement that im using the 20/20 vision of hindsight.
i personally would for matters of forum security have taken steps to ensure someone whose judgement seemed impaired by intoxication was unable to damage the collective works. i would have blocked his providers entire subnet range for as long as i thought it would take for him to wake up with a hangover, and as a secondary precaution would have changed his status from mod to plain old joe (in case he staggers to an internet cafe). and then i would mail him and tell him just that and wait and see.............

a safe balance of choice and responsibilty.

again easy to say in hindsight,but it seems like a logical optimum (as i read it, i could be wrong this may not be a bridge worth rebuilding thats up to David and Aaron, and David has stepped up and offered his hand.....)
if there is one effective counter to reactive tendancys.... its a capacity to recognise it, and strive to swallow pride and make things right.

Optimus Prime.....

always seek the best result you can

or to use the lingo of the kids....

itz just some internetz butthurtz build a bridge.........

either way, as long as we learn a little more ... about ourselves, about each other its all good in the grand scheme

 

[Gareth]

Mike Aaron wanted to leave. He told Dave to remove his account so Dave banned him. Its up to Aaron to come back if he wants.

 

[Ally]

First of all I did notice that Gil had left and I will miss both him and Aaron on these forums.

 

[ddd999]

I would like to see Aaron back, he's one cool dude and I do hope we'll see him again.

 

[trilithium]

I hope they both come back. I liked many of their contributions. David left the door open for Aaron and I hope he steps through it.

.....(you too Gil).

 

[jarshua]

I didn't see any of the offending posts from Aaron. I am very curious, how bad were they? Not that it matters but It's really had me wondering what he was saying. I would like to see him come back also.

 

[standup]

I'm new to the boards an arron was one of the first people who I exchanged some posts with... When I came back to the thread I saw he was banned!

I'll admit I dont know him from adam (or any of the back story to this), but he seemed like a nice guy and someone who you could "lock horns" with...

HOpe he comes back soon (at the very least to finish our conversation)...

 

[mike]

If Gil decided to use his online time to further his journey of discovery at sites elsewhere thats his biz.
if he mailed some ppl and told them why he would be gone, it was prob so they would not worry and think something bad had happened. but if it was done in PM by concious choice then one has to consider that in being discrete about it he was leaving a door open for himself to return when next hes in this neck of the woods. posting the sentiments of those PM's is likely to undermine that option.

Aaron seems to have chosen to cut his nose off to spite his face, and its this "loss of face" that is blocking his return nothing else.

Mr Biedny once stated "im done with the paracast" and disconnected, on air no less. but he still had the maturity to own it and take the criticism in the forums that followed.

my honest reading of this is Aaron was/is invested in the paracast, and its only wounded pride that flavours the situation as it stands.

a good way to handle criticism, is with critical thinking, did David pull Aaron up just to jerk his chain, or had he in fact been posting some senseless and insensitive remarks.....
Aaron should be able to use this input to improve his perspective and gain from the knowledge, not retreat to the shadows with the flushed face of embarrasment.

but either way the journey goes on, and lessons are learnt