Consciousness and the Paranormal

[Tyger]

@Soupie

If you decide to patter down the path of Steiner, you will find yourself having to take in Steiner's Cosmology. The Christ - the Anointed One - was one of the Elohim (from the Creation in the Bible) - etc..

Always keep in mind that Occultism (properly) is the Path of Knowledge - beginning with the head chakra, moving to engage the heart chakra, then going above - very much the western sequence as distinct from the eastern when one begins lower (root chakra) and comes up to the head through the heart (through the 'guru' - or teacher - a much safer route but also an older route, no longer applicable to the modern seeker, especially not the western seeker for whom the 'guru' is a throwback to another time). It is why the western path - starting at the head - is so much more dangerous (as we can see evidence around us) because the heart must be actively and consciously engaged - else thinking becomes cold and heartless. Also, it requires far more thinking for oneself - there is no 'guru' to take from 'on faith'. To do what the guru says to do is anathema to the Occult Path or Esoteric Path - because on that path one is making the decisions and choices oneself. It is a path of absolute freedom - and one must never take anything 'on faith' - one must find out for oneself by doing the inner work.

The thing about Steiner is that he is a good guide - but even he said that others would come after him that would correct his work. It's not about the details - the story he spins has a complex lineage itself. Some of the story - the 'facts' - are out of ancient esoteric tradition, out of both west and east, and some is out of his own spiritual research and experience. When he talks of the 'Mystery of Golgotha' - this was from his personal experience/research.

What you need to brace yourself for is the idea of 'the two Jesus children' - which was accepted as fact and known about up through the Middle Ages, in fact. (One can see the two children - with John the Baptist as a child, hence, three children - in several Medieval paintings). I was raised Catholic with a strong Jesuitical influence in my education from elementary through high school - so that some of the 'esoterics' did not surprise me when I came across them - though that there would actually be two children in actual fact I wasn't prepared for. However, I knew that the Matthew and Luke gospels were describing two different children - two different genealogies, two different circumstances of birth, and so on. The 'apologia' for this in Catholicism is that the Luke gospel is the 'real' gospel (lineage from Nathan, shepherds, angels, humble birth in a manger) - and the Matthew gospel (the 'kingly' lineage) was written as a treatise to convince the Jews of Jesus' kingly background to convince he was 'the Messiah' (visit of the 3 eastern kings in a house when the child was 2 years old, etc.) The usual creche scene with the 3 kings and the shepherds and angels at the manger is actually a conflating of the Luke and Matthew stories.

From Jesus to Christ (CW131)

According to Luke (The Gospel of Compassion and Love Revealed) (formerly The Gospel of St. Luke) (CW 114)

According to Matthew (The Gospel of Christ's Humanity) (formerly, The Gospel of St. Matthew) (CW 123)

Approaching the Mystery of Golgotha (CW 152)

Building Stones for an Understanding of the Mystery of Golgotha

 

[smcder]

The Influences of Lucifer and Ahriman

@Tyger: Fascinating, fascinating ... fascinating ... I have several other lectures downloaded on Christ ... do you know who it was that Steiner thought was the incarnation of Ahriman in China?

www.rudolfsteineraudio.com is a good resource ... and this too: Rudolf Steiner Archive

do you know if these lectures were in German or English originally? (or both!)

 

[smcder]

@Soupie

If you decide to patter down the path of Steiner, you will find yourself having to take in Steiner's Cosmology. The Christ - the Anointed One - was one of the Elohim (from the Creation in the Bible) - etc..

Always keep in mind that Occultism (properly) is the Path of Knowledge - beginning with the head chakra, moving to engage the heart chakra, then going above - very much the western sequence as distinct from the eastern when one begins lower (root chakra) and comes up to the head through the heart (through the 'guru' - or teacher - a much safer route but also an older route, no longer applicable to the modern seeker, especially not the western seeker for whom the 'guru' is a throwback to another time). It is why the western path - starting at the head - is so much more dangerous (as we can see evidence around us) because the heart must be actively and consciously engaged - else thinking becomes cold and heartless. Also, it requires far more thinking for oneself - there is no 'guru' to take from 'on faith'. To do what the guru says to do is anathema to the Occult Path or Esoteric Path - because on that path one is making the decisions and choices oneself. It is a path of absolute freedom - and one must never take anything 'on faith' - one must find out for oneself by doing the inner work.

The thing about Steiner is that he is a good guide - but even he said that others would come after him that would correct his work. It's not about the details - the story he spins has a complex lineage itself. Some of the story - the 'facts' - are out of ancient esoteric tradition, out of both west and east, and some is out of his own spiritual research and experience. When he talks of the 'Mystery of Golgotha' - this was from his personal experience/research.

What you need to brace yourself for is the idea of 'the two Jesus children' - which was accepted as fact and known about up through the Middle Ages, in fact. (One can see the two children - with John the Baptist as a child, hence, three children - in several Medieval paintings). I was raised Catholic with a strong Jesuitical influence in my education from elementary through high school - so that some of the 'esoterics' did not surprise me when I came across them - though that there would actually be two children in actual fact I wasn't prepared for. However, I knew that the Matthew and Luke gospels were describing two different children - two different genealogies, two different circumstances of birth, and so on. The 'apologia' for this in Catholicism is that the Luke gospel is the 'real' gospel (lineage from Nathan, shepherds, angels, humble birth in a manger) - and the Matthew gospel (the 'kingly' lineage) was written as a treatise to convince the Jews of Jesus' kingly background to convince he was 'the Messiah' (visit of the 3 eastern kings in a house when the child was 2 years old, etc.) The usual creche scene with the 3 kings and the shepherds and angels at the manger is actually a conflating of the Luke and Matthew stories.

From Jesus to Christ (CW131)

According to Luke (The Gospel of Compassion and Love Revealed) (formerly The Gospel of St. Luke) (CW 114)

According to Matthew (The Gospel of Christ's Humanity) (formerly, The Gospel of St. Matthew) (CW 123)

Approaching the Mystery of Golgotha (CW 152)

Building Stones for an Understanding of the Mystery of Golgotha

Always keep in mind that Occultism (properly) is the Path of Knowledge - beginning with the head chakra, moving to engage the heart chakra, then going above - very much the western sequence as distinct from the eastern when one begins lower (root chakra) and comes up to the head through the heart (through the 'guru' - or teacher - a much safer route but also an older route, no longer applicable to the modern seeker, especially not the western seeker for whom the 'guru' is a throwback to another time).

Yes! Excellent point ... the chakra meditations I practice all start at the root - very interesting distinction, the guru has also taken a beating in modern times ... but I think he exists still, in different forms - or no? Also, they are damned hard to find these days. At least where I go looking. Or, perhaps the pupil is not ready ...

 

[Tyger]

The Influences of Lucifer and Ahriman

@Tyger: Fascinating, fascinating ... fascinating ... I have several other lectures downloaded on Christ ... do you know who it was that Steiner thought was the incarnation of Ahriman in China?

Haven't heard of Ahriman incarnating in China. However, Steiner did indicate that the incarnations of Lucifer were over and the first incarnation of Ahriman would take place in our time (now - us). Lucifer had to do with individuality - and culture. Ahriman has to do with sameness and groups - I am giving a very simplistic rendering of the influences of these two beings as described by Steiner. Ahriman, however, is going to be one helluvva trip. Tends to be humorless.

The question is - where is Ahriman now? In fact, some speculation is that the internet is his incarnation 'body'.

The hallmark of Ahriman will be 'machine-like'. Sameness. Humorless. Material - nothing spiritual. For those us - which includes many of us - who have lived mainly under the individualistic, cultural auspice of Lucifer - it will be a hard transition. However, the balance between these two beings of Lucifer and Ahriman is the Christ Being - the Heart - Love.

www.rudolfsteineraudio.com is a good resource ... and this too: Rudolf Steiner Archive

do you know if these lectures were in German or English originally? (or both!)

Steiner always lectured in German as far as I know. When he lectured in England I believe he was translated - but I am not 100% certain.

 

[smcder]

@Tyger in lecture 1 here:

The Influences of Lucifer and Ahriman

Steiner mentions Ahriman as having incarnated in China 3 centuries before Christ, I believe - I'll see if I can find the reference. I know Robert McDermott mentioned that Steiner's work was written in a form common to German philosophy of the time and made for hard reading for modern audiences, I notice repitition and some other characteristics, but these may be because of the lecture format - I'll see if there is an original in German I can compare it to.

 

[Tyger]

Always keep in mind that Occultism (properly) is the Path of Knowledge - beginning with the head chakra, moving to engage the heart chakra, then going above - very much the western sequence as distinct from the eastern when one begins lower (root chakra) and comes up to the head through the heart (through the 'guru' - or teacher - a much safer route but also an older route, no longer applicable to the modern seeker, especially not the western seeker for whom the 'guru' is a throwback to another time).

Yes! Excellent point ... the chakra meditations I practice all start at the root - very interesting distinction, the guru has also taken a beating in modern times ... but I think he exists still, in different forms - or no? Also, they are damned hard to find these days. At least where I go looking. Or, perhaps the pupil is not ready ...

Teachers are everywhere in as sense. We are guides for each other. But a teacher in the sense that one can just lay down one's burden and rest with nary any thinking of one's own - nope. It is the nature of the initiation of the head chakra. No getting around it - no one can do that heavy-lifting for us - we must do it ourselves, We must go through the eye-of-the-needle of the mind on our own.

Always remember - you have an Angel, and a Higher Self (whatever one choose to name it) - who are one's devoted guides. And there is the Christ - the Initiator of our age. It is the Christ we encounter on the threshold. Love is the best guide - take rest and comfort in that intuition.

 

[Tyger]

@Tyger in lecture 1 here:

The Influences of Lucifer and Ahriman

Steiner mentions Ahriman as having incarnated in China 3 centuries before Christ, I believe - I'll see if I can find the reference. I know Robert McDermott mentioned that Steiner's work was written in a form common to German philosophy of the time and made for hard reading for modern audiences, I notice repitition and some other characteristics, but these may be because of the lecture format - I'll see if there is an original in German I can compare it to.

Please do - interesting. Perhaps it was an avatar of Ahriman? There were many such of Christ (Krishna, Zarathustra, are two) before his actual birth in Nazareth - according to the stories.

 

[Soupie]

Below is audio (with visual candy) of a talk by Terrance McKenna about DMT and the entities he consistently encountered there.

It's very relevant to this discussion; he describes how the entities create machines with their language and how they encourage/demand him to do the same. McKenna speculates about the meaning for our reality and the power of language to create/effect our world.

McKenna has named these entities Machine Elves but he explains that South American shamans believe the to be Helping Spirits and/or the ghosts/spirits of their familial ancestors.

 

[Todesangst]

Below is audio (with visual candy) of a talk by Terrance McKenna about DMT and the entities he consistently encountered there.

It's very relevant to this discussion; he describes how the entities create machines with their language and how they encourage/demand him to do the same. McKenna speculates about the meaning for our reality and the power of language to create/effect our world.

Ha, I just peeked into this forum for the first time and when I saw this thread title, that video and the subject of Mckenna's research immediately came to mind (as it does). Prompted me to join. DMT is fascinating business, probably the singular connecting thread to all occult material I've encountered since I started following this stuff a few years ago. Have you ever tried it yourself? I've experimented with it (and psilocybin mushrooms) a fair amount since 2010, and hoo boy... its pretty much the penultimate "mothership" experience that everyone describes. Once you do it, you pretty much never look at the totality of paranormal, UFO lore (or anything) quite the same way again. Terence himself is a highly synchronous figure.

The question is - where is Ahriman now? In fact, some speculation is that the internet is his incarnation 'body'. .

Nice, I never thought of it that way. I definitely feel that the internet is the body (or brain) of something.

 

[smcder]

Below is audio (with visual candy) of a talk by Terrance McKenna about DMT and the entities he consistently encountered there.

It's very relevant to this discussion; he describes how the entities create machines with their language and how they encourage/demand him to do the same. McKenna speculates about the meaning for our reality and the power of language to create/effect our world.

McKenna has named these entities Machine Elves but he explains that South American shamans believe the to be Helping Spirits and/or the ghosts/spirits of their familial ancestors.

The Psychedelic Salon podcast with Lorenzo is a good source for all things McKenna. Also see Rick Strassman's work on DMT:

Rick Strassman MD

McKenna is a complex figure ... listening to Steiner, I think McKenna is of that intellectual capacity but doesn't have the formal background in philosophy - and maybe a better comparison is with Gurdjieff in terms of the "trickster" aspect - although it would probably be said Gurdjieff was in better command of these aspects of himself ... (think "crazy wisdom" and the modern permutations of the guru idea - see also Chogyam Trungpa) ...

The Salon will have the last interview with McKenna just before his death (from an allegedly mushroom-shaped brain tumor) and in this he seems much more authentic especially than in his later presentations ... and there are interviews with his brother Dennis who recently published a book - this gives some balance to the McKenna legend. At some point, Terrance had a very bad experience on mushrooms and apparently never took them again, although he continued to talk about "heroic doses".

 

[smcder]

Ha, I just peeked into this forum for the first time and when I saw this thread title, that video and the subject of Mckenna's research immediately came to mind (as it does). Prompted me to join. DMT is fascinating business, probably the singular connecting thread to all occult material I've encountered since I started following this stuff a few years ago. Have you ever tried it yourself? I've experimented with it (and psilocybin mushrooms) a fair amount since 2010, and hoo boy... its pretty much the penultimate "mothership" experience that everyone describes. Once you do it, you pretty much never look at the totality of paranormal, UFO lore (or anything) quite the same way again. Terence himself is a highly synchronous figure.



Nice, I never thought of it that way. I definitely feel that the internet is the body (or brain) of something.

I don't know ... somehow I've never found that a convincing ideas - but recently the internet seems to have changed - finding specific things is harder, I feel like my attention is directed, that the internet isn't responsive but that it shapes your interactions somehow ... but I still don't have any sense that there is "any there there" - any kind of intelligence or coherence, anything that could be the basis of a mind or consciousness or incarnation - but I'm open to the idea, it is intriguing.

 

[Tyger]

The Salon will have the last interview with McKenna just before his death (from an allegedly mushroom-shaped brain tumor) and in this he seems much more authentic especially than in his later presentations

McKenna was more authentic in his last interview before his death than in his 'later presentations' - after his death?

... and there are interviews with his brother Dennis who recently published a book - this gives some balance to the McKenna legend. At some point, Terrance had a very bad experience on mushrooms and apparently never took them again, although he continued to talk about "heroic doses".

The teacher Oscar Ichazo ('Arica Institute') had a benign perspective regarding substances but his view was that such experiences must always be done with an experienced guide and that should only be done once or twice to show where one was going. After being given some insight as to the further way, he indicated that the path must be trodden 'on the ground', doing the exercises, living one's life in time. Relying upon such things - making them a 'regular' indulgence - was warned against.

 

[Tyger]

I don't know ... somehow I've never found that a convincing ideas - but recently the internet seems to have changed - finding specific things is harder, I feel like my attention is directed, that the internet isn't responsive but that it shapes your interactions somehow ... but I still don't have any sense that there is "any there there" - any kind of intelligence or coherence, anything that could be the basis of a mind or consciousness or incarnation - but I'm open to the idea, it is intriguing.

Interesting experience. I think the tailoring of the experience - of ads for example - will be the death of the internet. When it ceases to be a truly random exploration, why bother with it?

Mentioning the Ahrimanic incarnation vis-a-vis the internet was pure impishness on my part. The expectation is Ahriman's first incarnation will be in a human body. In fact he (or she) is suppose to be present in incarnation now, I understand. But rather than regale you with all the speculation, it must be understood that the Ahrimanic civilization that we are entering (and will last for a few thousand years) will have great good things about it - just like the civilization we are exiting that was under the aegis of the being Lucifer had great good things about it. As with all things - the Christ - the Heart - Love - is the balance the human being must bring to all things manifest and unmanifest.

 

[smcder]

McKenna was more authentic in his last interview before his death than in his 'later presentations' - after his death?



The teacher Oscar Ichazo ('Arica Institute') had a benign perspective regarding substances but his view was that such experiences must always be done with an experienced guide and that should only be done once or twice to show where one was going. After being given some insight as to the further way, he indicated that the path must be trodden 'on the ground', doing the exercises, living one's life in time. Relying upon such things - making them a 'regular' indulgence - was warned against.

than in presentations done later in his life - as compared to his early talks ... he started with small salon/living room presentations (from what I can tell from the recordings) and later became part of the rave scene (I guess you'd call it) with multimedia presentations ... in the last interview he admits that during his illness, he had extraordinary experiences without the use of these substances ...

I've read where Buddhist practitioners - with decades of meditation experience have taken DMT and stated they experienced nothing that had not occurred for them in their practice ... I don't know why so many people seem to think meditation is boring ...

;-)

To truly listen to another – without reacting, without infatuation, without dismissal, without boredom – is an art and a grace. To take in what a person is saying and, in this, to receive them completely, is a blessing to them and to yourself.

 

[Todesangst]

his final interviews were very interesting and somber, I think he had another with art bell about the surgical procedures he was undergoing at the time.
It's defintily an experience that I don't see how other westerners could so casually indulge in more than a handful of times off and on, psychonauts and such, as I dont see it as recreational; more as an Eziekiel/Close Encounter experience that can be had on the fly, and intensely rattling. I do think it makes sense that most global indigenous populations use it regularly and are fairly comfortable in-and-out of those environments, as their in tuned to the biosphere and bodily present than most industrial-borne westerners.

That's why I've always been curious about the claim that meditation can reproduce a Tryptamine experience/hallucination. Tryptamine states seem to have the opposite effect of meditation from my observations. Theyre very crystalline and kind of specific, kind of like mescaline will have a certain specific effect, or salvia will, etc. I guess I've just been kind of skeptical of that assertion (but of course, I haven't meditated as rigurously and long-term as they have, and I've even heard of alleged "dangers" of intensive meditation/mindfullness!)
I don't know if anyone here has tried Tryptamines, but that's probably the only convincing 'otherworldy' type experience i can relate to personally, besides poltergeists, ufos (which I've observed to happen in tandem with entheogeon experimentation, though rarely)

As for Tyger's Ahriman-internet idea, I was reminded of this wacky rant:

 

[Soupie]

Of the three methods of "expanding" consciousness: hallucinogens, meditation, and "exercises," I think it could be argued that humans have been utilizing hallucinogens the longest.

That doesn't make it superior per se, but it is interesting to note.

 

[Soupie]

Have you ever tried it yourself? I've experimented with it (and psilocybin mushrooms) a fair amount since 2010, and hoo boy... its pretty much the penultimate "mothership" experience that everyone describes. Once you do it, you pretty much never look at the totality of paranormal, UFO lore (or anything) quite the same way again.

I'm sorry to say I haven't.

Have you "encountered" any entities during your experiences of DMT? If so, do you have a sense of whether they were external or internal, that is, creations of your own mind?

 

[Todesangst]

I'm sorry to say I haven't.

Have you "encountered" any entities during your experiences of DMT? If so, do you have a sense of whether they were external or internal, that is, creations of your own mind?

For the first Q; In short, yes. I've had several trips that appeared to have the hallmarks of the "contact" scenario, albeit mostly seen with closed eyes or in the dark. The last time i did dmt was may 2013, and that time I smoked it thrice over a couple days, day and night, in the woods, and it was in a joint which was for me extremely potent compared to the previous pipe-methods (which spurred entity type experiences). With a joint, it was too overwhelming to discern anything like that, the forest seemed to explode into lovecraftian vegetable creatures all around us, ferns and branches started growing like tentacles, swaying like some sort of microbrial martian biodome.

But when I burned it in a pipe, even though they were "threshold" experiences, they were almost stranger. The first time i smoked in a dimly-lit room, there was a point where I saw what I can only describe as robotic geisha dolls flanking me and sort of gesturing and blessing me with their hands, while also seeming to scan me with a dust-vac.

The most occult experience was a month or so later in a room with no lights;
it was like a curtain being drawn, and reality was replaced by what I can only describe as a streaming Alien-Cartoon-language, suspended in a holographic space (like some sort of school or daycare).
I felt a surge of communication flood in from the periphery of my awareness (what I assume telepathy must feel like). I was somehow conveyed, thru this stream of information, a picture of human history and cultural iconography, as one sequence. Everything from Architectonic feats, Heroes, Religions, to technological inventions. I felt like entire cosmologies were being downloaded into my brain.
And as I watched this all unfold, I felt the presence of huge "entities" behind these forces, looming above me. Keep in mind this all happened in under 5 minutes, with a fairly low 'dose'...
Like Willy Wonka in his chocolate factory quiping, "We are the music makers, we are the dreamers of dreams," they seemed to say they were responsible for the enterprise of human civilization. From Pyramid-builders, Sun Cults, mythology, Religions worldwide. Hiding throughout time, masquerading as various Gods, Devils, and Heroes. Their past inceptions spreading like a living Domino Effect into the Present. But their substance or essence was unclear.
Like tricksters, they seemed to be 'mocking' me as they revealed this, ridiculing my puny obliviousness, bumbling about the rainbowed Hall o' Mirrors they had erected around us, etched into our ancestral memories like living hieroglyphics. "Oh you're so easy to fool, you take everything so seriously, look we create entire religions and watch the rise and fall of civilizations for fun"
Yet this mocking was coupled with another feeling, what seemed (at the time) like an "invitation." As I understood this colossal "Joke", It was as if they were saying, "YOU can become one of US."
Then the experience faded

Another time, I had what felt more like an "abduction". I hit the pipe and there were people in the room with me talking, which became distracting. I had my eyes closed and I saw what looked like "jesters" in swim-caps and 80's shades, with pointed, devilish faces. I was looking at them wondering how the hell my mind was just free-wheeling their appearance as I observed, and as I accepted their image they sort of shape-shifted (like those transformer movies) into twin praying mantises, and I got a very dark feeling. I felt like long fingers were sticking into my brain and running software on my nervous system. I couldnt move and kept having involuntary gulps and muscle-twitches in precise 1-2-3 sequences. Then I felt like I was being shown some sort of futuristic, apocalyptic borg-cube scenario that I was being offered a part in, and I physically said "No, No, No, I want nothing to do with this" then they departed and I came down/up.
the thing is, the thing that prompted these djinni looking fellows was the annoying chatter in the room that was bugging me. Which gave me a sense that at least this one may have been more colored by my internal responses to my environment. But I truly felt like I was being briefly "possessed" by an unpleasant life-form.

 

[Tyger]

Like Willy Wonka in his chocolate factory quiping, "We are the music makers, we are the dreamers of dreams,"

Can't let it pass because these are lines from one of my favorite poems - Ode by A. O'Shaughnessy. The bolded parts are often quoted -

LINK: Ode (O'Shaughnessy) - Wikisource, the free online library

We are the music makers,
And we are the dreamers of dreams,
Wandering by lone sea-breakers,
And sitting by desolate streams;—
World-losers and world-forsakers, 5
On whom the pale moon gleams:
Yet we are the movers and shakers
Of the world for ever, it seems.

With wonderful deathless ditties
We build up the world's great cities, 10
And out of a fabulous story
We fashion an empire's glory:
One man with a dream, at pleasure,
Shall go forth and conquer a crown;
And three with a new song's measure 15
Can trample a kingdom down.

We, in the ages lying
In the buried past of the earth,
Built Nineveh with our sighing,
And Babel itself in our mirth; 20
And o'erthrew them with prophesying
To the old of the new world's worth;
For each age is a dream that is dying,
Or one that is coming to birth.

A breath of our inspiration 25
Is the life of each generation;
A wondrous thing of our dreaming
Unearthly, impossible seeming—
The soldier, the king, and the peasant
Are working together in one, 30
Till our dream shall become their present,
And their work in the world be done.

They had no vision amazing
Of the goodly house they are raising;
They had no divine foreshowing 35
Of the land to which they are going:
But on one man's soul it hath broken,
A light that doth not depart;
And his look, or a word he hath spoken,
Wrought flame in another man's heart. 40

And therefore to-day is thrilling
With a past day's late fulfilling;
And the multitudes are enlisted
In the faith that their fathers resisted,
And, scorning the dream of to-morrow, 45
Are bringing to pass, as they may,
In the world, for its joy or its sorrow,
The dream that was scorned yesterday.

But we, with our dreaming and singing,
Ceaseless and sorrowless we! 50
The glory about us clinging
Of the glorious futures we see,
Our souls with high music ringing:
O men! it must ever be
That we dwell, in our dreaming and singing, 55
A little apart from ye.

For we are afar with the dawning
And the suns that are not yet high,
And out of the infinite morning
Intrepid you hear us cry— 60
How, spite of your human scorning,
Once more God's future draws nigh,
And already goes forth the warning
That ye of the past must die.

Great hail! we cry to the comers 65
From the dazzling unknown shore;
Bring us hither your sun and your summers;
And renew our world as of yore;
You shall teach us your song's new numbers,
And things that we dreamed not before: 70
Yea, in spite of a dreamer who slumbers,
And a singer who sings no more.

 

[Todesangst]

During the more occult type "communications" I felt like I was given leads, or clues that I was meant to pursue in the material world to further my understanding. One such concept was how language and symbolism could somehow be wielded to bind "ideas" in order to produce physical manifestations, and to influence populations of people, for Good or ill. That people had been doing this for a while.
I got the impression of some sort of "Mind War" or psychic Arms-race occurring on the planet, and that I was to somehow play a part in this. These led me to similar ideas in the works of Crowley and such Magickal systems.
I also found similar ideas in people like Rudolph Steiner, as my visions involved 'blueprints' of the ordering of consciousness, as cells within cells within cells, or smaller gods branching from larger gods, all branching from a singularity. Fragmented consciousness interpenetrating into denser states of energy, like Steiner's chains of being
So the experiences definitly had an impacted on me, gave me material to pursue that was previously outside the sphere of my memetic awareness.
During these mind-states, I approached a level where I could see ourselves as expressions of these Entities, or vice-versa. I felt that beneath the cloak of matter and ego, we are all just undead creatures that love eachother, suspended in eternity with no real understanding of how we got here. That's the closest way I can describe the feeling, at least.

As for the external/internal paradigm and where these experiences lie within, I guess I dont know where it ends/begins. These are all sort of highly experiential phenomena, based on perception. Obviously there were no radioactive scorch-marks (that I noticed) to that degree of physicality. But these usually happened close to group UFO sightings incidentally, and prompting me to research into such cross-phenomenon.
I do think both the molecular vehicle and user-memories will color the personal experience uniquely, while overlayed onto the same basic skeleton of events. It's an experience that is basically filtered through everyone's individual view of the world. It has given me a particular understanding of reality, human history, and the influences and inheritances that shape our perceptions. Incidentally, my father's side of my family is in Mexico and I apparently come from a lineage of shamans with Aztec/Toltec roots, which may explain why my visions are distinctly tinged with Toltec motifs, architecture and glyphs. I remember seeing visual spaces that were like neon, living mayan hyper-cities with streaming codices and I would think, "Oh, so this is what my ancestors were seeing!" The images seem to have been recapitulated from my ancestry into my own neurology. So I guess that's a chicken-egg scenario for you to decide. It definitely appears that theres a kind of virtual reality in our heads that we'd call the imagination, and it is at least populated by uncanny constructs and personalities and creatures that seem to react to thoughts.