• NEW! LOWEST RATES EVER -- SUPPORT THE SHOW AND ENJOY THE VERY BEST PREMIUM PARACAST EXPERIENCE! Welcome to The Paracast+, eight years young! For a low subscription fee, you can download the ad-free version of The Paracast and the exclusive, member-only, After The Paracast bonus podcast, featuring color commentary, exclusive interviews, the continuation of interviews that began on the main episode of The Paracast. We also offer lifetime memberships! Flash! Take advantage of our lowest rates ever! Act now! It's easier than ever to susbcribe! You can sign up right here!

    Subscribe to The Paracast Newsletter!

Official funny stuff

Forums New posts

Free episodes:

Status
Not open for further replies.
stonehart said:
This thread needs a full Carlin show sooooooooooooooooo here we go :D

but....... WARNING EXPLICIT LANGUAGE!!!!

Click to expand...

When I click on the YouTube link the message "This Video Is Not Available In Your Country" appears. Comforting to know we are so carefully protected from ourselves. :rolleyes:
 
There are some lines that just should not be crossed

Female and pregnant Vader........

afbb8c76933a0285a217bbdf7734c3a9.jpg


The Just Wrong is strong in this one
 
A guy is browsing the paper and sees an ad that simply reads: Talking Dog for sale
The guy always wanted a dog and figures that it might be worth checking out
He drives to the house, rings the bell, and the owner opens the door.
"You here about my dog?"
"Er, yea.."
"He's in the back."
The owner wanders to another room so guy leads himself to the backyard where a well groomed Labrador is sitting.

They eye each other in silence before the guy hesitantly ask, "So...You talk?"
The Lab cocks his head to side before replying in clear plain English: "Yep!".
After picking his jaw off the floor, the guy exclaims 'Oh my god! How is this possible?!"

The Lab looks up and says, 'Truth be told, I dunno. I was just born this way"
"My mom and dad lived on a farm in Kansas. I spent the first few years of my life herding cattle and running errands for our masters. But I realize pretty quickly that I should be doing more with my special talent."
"I decided that I wanted to help protect the country I love so much and got in touch with the CIA . In no time at all they had me flying from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping
"Thanks to the intelligence I gathered, the CIA was able to prevent dozens of terrorist plots against the U.S."

"I was their most valuable spy for over a decade. But all the traveling tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals."

Then I got married, had a mess of puppies, saw them all through Police Dog Academy, and now I'm just retired."

The guy is amazed. He runs back into the house and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.
"Ten dollars," the owner says.
"Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! And a hero! Why on earth are you selling him for so cheap?"

"Because he's a goddamn liar! He never did any of that shit!"
 
Your Twerking has caused a great disturbance in the force......


Disclaimer: They are wearing Rubies brand stormtrooper armour, no real white armour fan would be caught dead in this kit. But the clip itself is funny enough
 
Last edited by a moderator:
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top